Archive for July, 2013

There is a phrase that a young single bisexual woman interested in participating in a threesome with a hetero couple is a unicorn.  Because this woman is impossible to find.  Well not that impossible it turns out – I was that woman last night.

I answered an advert on Craigslist.  Apparently written by the female half of the couple (actually written by the man – she did though do the replying to me).  We exchanged some emails, mutually decided that neither of us was to weird to meet up with and agreed to meet.

We met for a meal together (they paid – so happy about that, am very poor atm).  They seemed very normal, I came across well.  We returned to their apartment, had another drink.  Showered and retired to the bedroom.

I had been informed that the female half of this couple was bisexual too.  I really am not sure.  She seemed to be very directed by the male in her ideas, and what she wanted.  Generally not just in the bedroom.  And there were definitely the feeling sometimes that she was totally not into what was going on.  We kissed for a very long time, and she didn’t seem to get anything from this at all.  So i definitely didn’t feel she was that interested. 

Later the man informed me that she would maybe be more willing to explore my body if I didn’t have pubic hair, she really doesn’t like it apparently.  Also he said that he finds that 3somes are more exciting, exponentially so.  This really made me feel that it was his suggestions and she simply went along with them.  This doesn’t exactly feel great for me.  He also overstepped one of two boundaries that I set out.  Which is pretty shitty really.

The sex overall though was simply amazing, I had a number of orgasms, as did she and he also came more then once.  in many respects it was a lovely evening, fine food, interesting company, good sex.

I have been invited to be their Unicorn at the weekend.  I’m not sure if I will attend.

I expected this post to be different from the one that I am writing.  I expected it to be full of my fears, trepidations, emotions as I stepped out into the bright new world of Full Service Sex Work.  Instead I am writing about Lies.

This isn’t due to any harm coming to me.  Just a comment on the fantasy world this client created, and wanted to share.  He assured me he knew everywhere, like the back of his hand.  As we started on a short tourist tour of the city.  After a while it became clear he did not.  His grasp of the local language was exaggerated.  I am sure his position in his job was exaggerated.  It soon felt nothing he said was true.  

He told me stories of his ex, although I now suspect that this “girlfriend” is his former wife.  He told me his apartment was shared with a friend.  I think he is sleeping on the floor of the living room of the apartment he shares with his former wife. 

He told me about experiences he had clearly never had.  How this had resulted in the most amazing experiences, yet never shared beyond that.  He wanted to agree with everything I think.

I met his friends. His behavior was bizarre.  One of them appeared to be his boss.  His friends were lovely sane people.  I liked them a lot.  One said something about how sometimes at clubs there are older men, who are very nice, buy you drinks, take you home to prove to their wife they still “have it”.  I think this was a reference to my client and his behavior.

The sex was terrible – like the fumblings of a teenager.  I lied, bashfully, about cumming.  Maybe I should have taken time to improve his technique, but he wasn’t paying me nearly enough for that.  It didn’t last long (thankfully).  We left for a party.

The party was ace – just the sort of thing I would do in my own free time.  Was so happy for that.  Amazing place, atmosphere, music, people.  Loved every second of it.  Apart from the oppressive heat.

But the whole night has left me wondering about the truth of this man and his life. 


Posted: July 25, 2013 in Uncategorized
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I did something today, something I have never done before.

I posted an advert.  An advert that was advertising myself.  Now I just have to wait and see if anyone answers.  If no one does I guess I have to overcome the sadness of a slightly broken ego.  Everyone’s ego would surely be a little broken if no one wanted them. 

I will then reword the advert as my rational mind will tell my irrational emotions and sense of rejection that it’s ok, the wording was just off.  I am a very desirable individual, and of course people want me.

Wish me luck


To Eat a Whale

Posted: July 22, 2013 in Uncategorized
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I saw a whale, a minke whale.  I saw this whale in the sea, and then I saw the whale (presumably not the same individual) in the supermarket.  It was frozen, and minced.  Some strange part of me felt compelled to buy it, taste it.  To know what this massive creature tasted like on a plate. 

According to some I have met it is very tasty, juicy.  I read a leaflet saying that although billed as a traditional Icelandic dish only 5% of Icelanders regularly consume this large sea mammal.

It is not possible (again according to the “meet us, don’t eat us” campaign) to kill such a large animal in the difficult conditions of the ocean in an ethical and humane manner.  I can well believe that.  How do you kill and drag a several tonne animal out of the sea without causing it to suffer?  But also there must surely be an element of suffering in the ending of life of all animals slaughtered for food. 

The whale has at least been free in the ocean.  I sincerely doubt that the whale could ever be domesticated and raised within confinement.  It’s life has been shortened.  But it has known the freedom of the earth’s oceans.  Compare this now to the cow, confined within a farm where the only consideration for it is how to make it fatter quicker.  That is not a life to aspire too. 

Consider also the food for each of these creatures.  The cow fed on the soy bean, growing in the tropics destroying the forests there by the acre.  The whale fed on the smallest creatures in the sea. 

Eating both these creatures is destroying the world and the way it functions.  But which is worse I could not tell you.  In each case an animal dies, an eco system is upset. 

But I can tell you the whale tastes like the most juicy tasty steak you will have ever eaten

Back to the Hustle

Posted: July 22, 2013 in Uncategorized
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So, after a number of weeks in the wilderness it is now time to return back to work and try and fund the rest of my travels.  Next stop is Berlin, a good big capital so should be able to pick up some work there in the 3 weeks (maybe a little less) I’m staying.

I have already been emailing a few people.  Have an interview to do some scantily clad cleaning.  That sounds pretty hopeful.  So fingers crossed.  That feels like a real blast from the past.  Have done similar work before and it can definitely be really fun. 

Also have been emailing a few people about photo shoots, so maybe one off those will work out OK.  So often there are time wasters though.  Is a massive pain in the ass. 

Even if nothing does work out, should be able to make it back to the UK where I have some definite bits of work lined up.  Is always a reassuring feeling.

Names and Titles

Posted: July 21, 2013 in Uncategorized
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For the past few weeks I have been volunteering in the Wilderness (hence the minimal blogging happening).  Whilst there volunteers came and went.  Including one who’s given name is the same as the name that I use whilst working. 

I didn’t tell her this,  I think maybe that would be a strange thing to say to someone: “your name, it’s the one I use whilst getting naked on the internet for strangers”.  It felt strange to say her name, to hear her name, to see her name.  For me it had entirely different connotations, meanings. 

In my everyday life I use the title Ms.  I don’t like to be referred to as a Miss, it makes me feel like a child.  To my married friends the use of Mrs can be very important.  To trans friends the use of the correct title is important.  How other people refer to and name us is important to each of us.  It explains a little about use, who we are.  If we use a nickname, have an unusual name, if we are fussy on the pronunciation.  All these things explain a little about who we are.  

Everything has names, names that are given by the people around them.  Plants have names and contained within them are the stories and the culture.  And this is surely wiped if plants are referred to using only the clinical and  scientific binomial or latin name.  Although this is the universal, the shared name, so that communication about the same plant is made easier.  But the local history and culture is wiped away.  In exchange for this useful universal understanding we pay with the loss of the individuality of the story.

Names change things.  Sometimes I doubt the name I have chosen for my work name, sometimes I just use my normal name.  Maybe I will find my stage name (or it will find me) and suddenly everything will somehow become easier.