Posts Tagged ‘name’

Names and Titles

Posted: July 21, 2013 in Uncategorized
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For the past few weeks I have been volunteering in the Wilderness (hence the minimal blogging happening).  Whilst there volunteers came and went.  Including one who’s given name is the same as the name that I use whilst working. 

I didn’t tell her this,  I think maybe that would be a strange thing to say to someone: “your name, it’s the one I use whilst getting naked on the internet for strangers”.  It felt strange to say her name, to hear her name, to see her name.  For me it had entirely different connotations, meanings. 

In my everyday life I use the title Ms.  I don’t like to be referred to as a Miss, it makes me feel like a child.  To my married friends the use of Mrs can be very important.  To trans friends the use of the correct title is important.  How other people refer to and name us is important to each of us.  It explains a little about use, who we are.  If we use a nickname, have an unusual name, if we are fussy on the pronunciation.  All these things explain a little about who we are.  

Everything has names, names that are given by the people around them.  Plants have names and contained within them are the stories and the culture.  And this is surely wiped if plants are referred to using only the clinical and  scientific binomial or latin name.  Although this is the universal, the shared name, so that communication about the same plant is made easier.  But the local history and culture is wiped away.  In exchange for this useful universal understanding we pay with the loss of the individuality of the story.

Names change things.  Sometimes I doubt the name I have chosen for my work name, sometimes I just use my normal name.  Maybe I will find my stage name (or it will find me) and suddenly everything will somehow become easier.



I have recently spent some time carefully sewing and creating the perfect french maid outfit.  I need this outfit to do some sexy waitress role-play work for a small group of men playing poker. 

This made me think about the importance of costume in playing a character.  How with the perfect outfit i can transform into someone else, a person who will girlishly giggle (though not to much), perch on laps and wish good luck to these poker players.  And without the outfit i could not do this, i could not be that person whilst wearing my onesie (yes i have one – it’s a dinosaur), or whilst wearing scruffy combat trousers and a hoody.  Like magic the outfit, the disguise (think Mr Ben – god i loved that program as a child) changes me and releases me from the constraints of being me. 

I was watching “Never Been Kissed” recently (i know – i need a life) and in that a character creates their disguise to become someone else, and referenced through out is shakespeare’s As You Like It “All the world’s a stage, … and all the men and women merely players”.  This french maid job really makes me feel that this is performance, these people are paying for a fantasy which we create together.  Although they are also the directors and have the control of the final cut. 

This then brings me on to the importance of Name, when I do my WebCam work i go under a different name,  if i go on stage to do a burlesque show, i use a different name.  Why?  The same reason.  The name is my mask, my performance, my act.  Somehow it protects me (actually it does – from internet stalking etc).  Shields me like plate armour.

i started to think about the importance of name within my last waitress job (in a cafe).  There my shortened name was once again lengthened to my full name, it was strange at first, but then it was reassuring to turn up, take on this name and serve the coffees, beers and food.

But for this French Maid job, they have my real name,  I don’t seem able to get out of the habit of signing my name off at the bottom of emails (more fool me).  So the costume is important, the make up, the wall that i build between me and them.