Posts Tagged ‘Work’

Old Vs. Young

Posted: October 23, 2013 in Uncategorized
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It has been a while since I have posted.  Life has been incredibly busy recently, it always is at the end of the summer travels. 

I am now back at home and settling in work, study, life.  I’m working just a little because I don’t need to work more and I don’t want to.  I work to live, not live to work. 

Today I would like to talk about age of my clients.  My clients vary in age, from their early 20s to somewhere in their 60s.  All of my clients have been civil and lovely to me. 

My older clients are delightful, gentle (except when we’ve agreed for something more kinky) and, they love to make me come.  I mean seriously.  They want to make me cum, and cum, and then cum some more.  sometimes it gets to a point where I literally can not come anymore.  I am begging them to stop, there is only so much pleasure that a body can take. 

I am lucky because I can cum again and again.  Also it isn’t that hard to make me cum.  If I am in the mood for cumming it literally is a matter of stopping me from cumming. 

These older clients take some of the meeting time to talk, about themselves, their lives, their ideas.  There is a connection that forms between us during the session. 

Younger clients though are a whole other kettle of fish.  There was one who wanted to fuck for the WHOLE hour, constantly.  He would cum and then be trying to get it hard again.  He wanted to squeeze every second out of that session.  There was little talking, just fucking.  It was exhausting, one of the most exhausting meets I have ever had. 

I wonder how these two different sets of people differ in what they are trying to get out of the session.  A sensual enjoyable session with connection and pleasure.  A session which is just an alternative to masturbation with a pretty face (me? modest?) to help them along. 

Bring on more of the oldies please xxx





Number 4

Posted: August 12, 2013 in Uncategorized
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This client was a delight.  It felt like the first “proper” client, as this was my first client beyond the learning how to do this SW thing where I have often been underpaid.  This client gave me my pay at the beginning of our meeting, it was in a white envelope.  It was pretty cool really.

We share canapes, drank beer, drank wine.  He taught me about good Tequila and bad Tequila.  We tasted good Tequila, it was very pleasant.

We talked, he wanted to know about my experiences on craigslist. I felt awkward sharing this information with him.  I told a few stories though.  He seemed to like that.  We chatted for a long time.  About all sorts of things.  He was a very interesting person.

We had sex.  He was very much in control, there was a strength to him and authority that could easily have become scary.  But it was also very enjoyable.  He made me cum a number of times.  He never did.  But he also gave the impression that was a normal for him.

We said good bye, and I walked home, much drunker then I had planned to get.

I like to keep myself safe.  And that is why, for me, using a condom every single time genitals touch is important.  Really important.  To protect me, them, everyone from disease, pregnancy, etc.

I really don’t understand why you wouldn’t WANT to use them.

But, over the last year this boundary, although always clearly stated, has been broken a number of times.  In my personal and business life.  It is just such a rude thing to do.  I really do not get it.

I give my consent to have sex with you, not get infected by you.

I have now got the stress of going to get tested for STI’s because some rubbish people had to have sex without a condom, without discussing this first.

Also in the last year I have met people who have argued about using a condom (both within my private life).  No condom, no sex, it really is very simple.  But people make out like wanting to use a condom is strange.  I don’t know where you’ve been so stay out of there without protection

Answering craigslist adverts is always entertaining.  Found a particularly special job recently.  This was to take photos of a naked, masturbating man.  He wanted these photos to swap with his hot lover.  Which is all kind of sweet really.

We met, drank wine, talked.  Reassuring each other that neither of us were insane people.  Neither of us appeared to be to crazy.  So with a little giggling we returned to his apartment. 

His apartment was amazing.  A really beautiful space.  A little overly large maybe, but it was really lovely.

He was awkward, this was clearly something he had never done before, being naked and sexual in front of a total stranger.  I tried to reassure him, allow him to make the boundaries of what he was comfortable with.

We took some good photos together.  I really enjoy it, I think I would like to take more photos of men masturbating.  But maybe I am just a little strange. 

He showed me the pictures his lover had sent.  They were really amazing.  Very sexy and hot.  I hope she likes the photos I took.

Overall it was a very enjoyable evening.  I hope for more work like this

two and three

Posted: August 1, 2013 in Uncategorized
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Client two and three, a little about my experiences with them.

client two had made a real effort.  He wasn’t sure what to expect. what to do.  He had lit candles all around the place.  We drank and talked, putting the world to rights,  Politics, films, Life.  It was good to chat.  And then he came over and sat next to me.  Stripped me, with amazing consent.  like he had read and taken in all the consent Zines in the world.  And he made me cum and cum and cum.  it really was quite quite amazing.  And then I left.

Client three was awful.  The evening was good, we ate good food, his voice was lovely – it was the best part.  He isn’t so well off, and I was payed very little for this evenings work.  And he kissed like an octopus tentacle.  Shoving his tongue as far into my mouth as possible, and sucking my lips so hard it hurt.  It was horrific.  And he whispered these sweet nothings that simply came across as creepy and horrible.  It continued on in this horrific fashion.  Until it was late enough i could demand to sleep.  We woke for breakfast, had sex. Ate. Went out, I was glad to see the back of him.   

I expected this post to be different from the one that I am writing.  I expected it to be full of my fears, trepidations, emotions as I stepped out into the bright new world of Full Service Sex Work.  Instead I am writing about Lies.

This isn’t due to any harm coming to me.  Just a comment on the fantasy world this client created, and wanted to share.  He assured me he knew everywhere, like the back of his hand.  As we started on a short tourist tour of the city.  After a while it became clear he did not.  His grasp of the local language was exaggerated.  I am sure his position in his job was exaggerated.  It soon felt nothing he said was true.  

He told me stories of his ex, although I now suspect that this “girlfriend” is his former wife.  He told me his apartment was shared with a friend.  I think he is sleeping on the floor of the living room of the apartment he shares with his former wife. 

He told me about experiences he had clearly never had.  How this had resulted in the most amazing experiences, yet never shared beyond that.  He wanted to agree with everything I think.

I met his friends. His behavior was bizarre.  One of them appeared to be his boss.  His friends were lovely sane people.  I liked them a lot.  One said something about how sometimes at clubs there are older men, who are very nice, buy you drinks, take you home to prove to their wife they still “have it”.  I think this was a reference to my client and his behavior.

The sex was terrible – like the fumblings of a teenager.  I lied, bashfully, about cumming.  Maybe I should have taken time to improve his technique, but he wasn’t paying me nearly enough for that.  It didn’t last long (thankfully).  We left for a party.

The party was ace – just the sort of thing I would do in my own free time.  Was so happy for that.  Amazing place, atmosphere, music, people.  Loved every second of it.  Apart from the oppressive heat.

But the whole night has left me wondering about the truth of this man and his life. 


Posted: July 25, 2013 in Uncategorized
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I did something today, something I have never done before.

I posted an advert.  An advert that was advertising myself.  Now I just have to wait and see if anyone answers.  If no one does I guess I have to overcome the sadness of a slightly broken ego.  Everyone’s ego would surely be a little broken if no one wanted them. 

I will then reword the advert as my rational mind will tell my irrational emotions and sense of rejection that it’s ok, the wording was just off.  I am a very desirable individual, and of course people want me.

Wish me luck


Back to the Hustle

Posted: July 22, 2013 in Uncategorized
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So, after a number of weeks in the wilderness it is now time to return back to work and try and fund the rest of my travels.  Next stop is Berlin, a good big capital so should be able to pick up some work there in the 3 weeks (maybe a little less) I’m staying.

I have already been emailing a few people.  Have an interview to do some scantily clad cleaning.  That sounds pretty hopeful.  So fingers crossed.  That feels like a real blast from the past.  Have done similar work before and it can definitely be really fun. 

Also have been emailing a few people about photo shoots, so maybe one off those will work out OK.  So often there are time wasters though.  Is a massive pain in the ass. 

Even if nothing does work out, should be able to make it back to the UK where I have some definite bits of work lined up.  Is always a reassuring feeling.

Names and Titles

Posted: July 21, 2013 in Uncategorized
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For the past few weeks I have been volunteering in the Wilderness (hence the minimal blogging happening).  Whilst there volunteers came and went.  Including one who’s given name is the same as the name that I use whilst working. 

I didn’t tell her this,  I think maybe that would be a strange thing to say to someone: “your name, it’s the one I use whilst getting naked on the internet for strangers”.  It felt strange to say her name, to hear her name, to see her name.  For me it had entirely different connotations, meanings. 

In my everyday life I use the title Ms.  I don’t like to be referred to as a Miss, it makes me feel like a child.  To my married friends the use of Mrs can be very important.  To trans friends the use of the correct title is important.  How other people refer to and name us is important to each of us.  It explains a little about use, who we are.  If we use a nickname, have an unusual name, if we are fussy on the pronunciation.  All these things explain a little about who we are.  

Everything has names, names that are given by the people around them.  Plants have names and contained within them are the stories and the culture.  And this is surely wiped if plants are referred to using only the clinical and  scientific binomial or latin name.  Although this is the universal, the shared name, so that communication about the same plant is made easier.  But the local history and culture is wiped away.  In exchange for this useful universal understanding we pay with the loss of the individuality of the story.

Names change things.  Sometimes I doubt the name I have chosen for my work name, sometimes I just use my normal name.  Maybe I will find my stage name (or it will find me) and suddenly everything will somehow become easier.


I have recently spent some time carefully sewing and creating the perfect french maid outfit.  I need this outfit to do some sexy waitress role-play work for a small group of men playing poker. 

This made me think about the importance of costume in playing a character.  How with the perfect outfit i can transform into someone else, a person who will girlishly giggle (though not to much), perch on laps and wish good luck to these poker players.  And without the outfit i could not do this, i could not be that person whilst wearing my onesie (yes i have one – it’s a dinosaur), or whilst wearing scruffy combat trousers and a hoody.  Like magic the outfit, the disguise (think Mr Ben – god i loved that program as a child) changes me and releases me from the constraints of being me. 

I was watching “Never Been Kissed” recently (i know – i need a life) and in that a character creates their disguise to become someone else, and referenced through out is shakespeare’s As You Like It “All the world’s a stage, … and all the men and women merely players”.  This french maid job really makes me feel that this is performance, these people are paying for a fantasy which we create together.  Although they are also the directors and have the control of the final cut. 

This then brings me on to the importance of Name, when I do my WebCam work i go under a different name,  if i go on stage to do a burlesque show, i use a different name.  Why?  The same reason.  The name is my mask, my performance, my act.  Somehow it protects me (actually it does – from internet stalking etc).  Shields me like plate armour.

i started to think about the importance of name within my last waitress job (in a cafe).  There my shortened name was once again lengthened to my full name, it was strange at first, but then it was reassuring to turn up, take on this name and serve the coffees, beers and food.

But for this French Maid job, they have my real name,  I don’t seem able to get out of the habit of signing my name off at the bottom of emails (more fool me).  So the costume is important, the make up, the wall that i build between me and them.